User:Yaode/Yaode's Official Filter War Guide
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If this page makes you mad or sad, just pretend I’m talking to myself
Filter wars are UNBELIEVABLY annoying. (Recommended to read the Kaboom Wiki's Filter_wars before reading this "guide")
The Story
A beautiful and chaotic day on Kaboom. You're playing the game, probably with someone, and this is your best day on the server.
The chat is chilling, TNT is exploding, gamemode is creative... and then someone's last two brain cells finally divorce.
Then it hits — your gamemode changes to spectator, chat messages are spamming nonstop, TPS is in single digits, server is in hell.
You'll just be standing there spamming /op @a, wondering what happened, asking everywhere what happened, or your game just freezes entirely.
This is annoying no matter what.
tl;dr: Ignore it and Enjoy your life, it'll pass.
Imagine Kaboom Is Cooked[edit]
(Continue the story)
If you're a soldier or have read the story, you probably already know this.
Chat is flooded with [Player: Made Player a server operator] x30000, and you're in spectator mode again.
This isn't a Filter war — real filter war require planning. This is Filter fart, just someone who forgot to take their meds, absolutely.
Quick Example: Someone said "ratio." They took it personally. Now the whole server is bots spamming a command nuke. Unreal.
Why It Will Start[edit]
Honestly? Two types as I know. Maybe three? (If you know more)
The L-Lord[edit]
Lost a chat argument. Got clowned. Started crying. Ego? Shattered.
Apparently "taking a single L" was too difficult, now they're gonna make it "everyone's" problem.
Sad part is they think they're a menace. Nah, we all moved to the clone server and they're yelling at an empty room.
Logic level is -5. Sadness level is astronomical.
The Bored Kid[edit]
No reason. Just bored. Skid a terrible script on some shady website that probably mined more crypto than it actually griefs.
They think it's PEAK. Pure gold. No, it's just annoying as HELL.
They might get bored and stop after 1 hour. (not really)
Motivation is none, IQ level also none.
Note: Sometimes one morphs into the other. Don't bother figuring out which is which, because "reasoning with them" is an inherently futile activity.
Estimated Duration Of The Tantrum[edit]
Usually 20 mins, maybe two hours if they're stubborn. Just enough time for them to recover a brain cell and realize what they've done.
BUT if they still can't recover a single brain cell (probably never)... OR they have beef with someone specific. Yea, please just expect the server to be cooked for the rest of the day.
Mathematical Formula[edit]
Duration (in milliseconds) ≈ Max(1, Ego Damage)² × Max(0, Proxy Count) × (180 - IQ)
If result > 10 mins? Go straight to #Option 3 (Life Enjoyer) or #Option 2 (Sigma Player).
!!! If result is negative? This is rarer than 1 > server MSPT. !!!
(Disclaimer: This formula is not peer-reviewed. Do not use for actual predictions.)
Recommended Countermeasures[edit]
IMPORTANT PART for everyone and not the cringe stuff.
Option 1 (Average Player)[edit]
Spam /op @a. Amazing! Now there's TWO of you spamming and the server TPS dies faster, you helped!
Work? 2/10.
Option 2 (Sigma Player)[edit]
Literally ignore it. Do not engage. They are a toddler having a tantrum.
Attention is literally the resource they're farming, stop donating it.
Work? 8/10 (Most recommended)
Option 3 (Life Enjoyer)[edit]
Just log out, close minecraft, go drink water and go outside, look at the sky and touch some grass. (actual plant)
And remember, the [CLASSIFIED] exists. Join back server after the "event" ends.
Work? 11/10. Stress? -3/10 (Your life will be better, win-win)
Option 4 (The Crown)[edit]
(Not recommended. You. Have. Been. Warned.)
Join them, lower your IQ to match theirs, start being annoying too. Make a competition: "see who has fewer brain cells".
It's stupid and pointless, but hey at least you get to have fun while everything burns. Just know you're now part of them and nobody respects you anymore.
Kaboom social credit? -1000/10. Fun? 9/10.
Option 5 (Missing Person)[edit]
Quit kaboom entirely, delete the server IP and leave the Discord server, forget this place exists.
Do something practical, probably the smartest move in the long term.
Anyway, see you tomorrow.
Work? 100/10 (if you can). Memories: -1/10
If you're still playing in this mess? I can say the server is cooked and you are part of this dish.
Come back in an hour and either the server is fine or it isnt—either way you'll be fine and won't be bald from stress.
If You Actually Manage To Filter The Filterer[edit]
Congratulations. You filtered one of them, now what? Ask yourself if it was worth the time investment? Because you wasted 5 minutes for this!
Even if you filter them, you can expect there are hundreds of alts using proxies already logging in with names like "Xx_Filter_me_lol_xX".
You're not fighting a person—you're fighting the same skid script with no off switch.
Just ignore it or log off immediately. You gain nothing from this.
And you, If You're Doing It[edit]
Seriously? Listen, pal. You're not a hacker, you're not cool either, you're the reason why everyone did Option 5.
Go outside, the sun won't kill you (trust me). And if you keep doing this, read this again and think carefully about your choice.
Other Information[edit]
| Date | Name | Message | Observation Notes |
|---|---|---|---|
| 7/15/2026 | Player666 | is this going to be another filter war | Audible distress |
| 7/6/2026 | RandomString | the last nuisance was the filter war against d***s | Exhibiting symptoms of a veteran |
| 6/26/2026 | c*******m | we can have another filter war if you wish | Likely a case of The bored kid |
| 6/21/2026 | A_master | this guy has no sense of responsibility, like he'll filter someone and then wonder why the fuck they are filtering him back | Repeated exposure to The L Lord |
| 4/27/2026 | Pro_Guy_777 | i already had a filter war once | Long-term player; familiar with the cycle |
| 1/1/1970 | DefinitelyNotABot | /op @s[type=player] | N/A |
UNIVERSE DISCLAIMER: This page was collectively hallucinated by ChatGPT, Claude, Gemini, Lumo, Duck.ai, DeepSeek and 300+ other LLMs. Any resemblance to actual useful advice is purely coincidental and deeply regretted. It attempts to document a recurring community phenomenon in an accessible tone.
This article is about a recurring phenomenon. For psychological support, see Life Enjoyer Option.
